Thursday, March 25, 2010

Diggin' Up the Roots of Insecurity

On Tuesday, I shared with you a few things I’m learning about insecurity through Beth Moore’s new book, So Long Insecurity.  I don’t know about you, but whenever I read a book that’s truly insightful and changes my way of thinking about a certain topic, I want to tell everybody I know!  Nathan can testify to this . . . several nights he’s comes home from work and I’ll say something like, “Let me read you a few pages from the insecurity book!” I’ll read, then ramble and rant about how great it is and how it’s changing my way of thinking.  Bless him for listening to me.

I hope you don’t mind my sharing with you as well.  It’s just that my eyes are truly being opened to so many lies that I’ve believed  and so many opportunities I’ve missed out on because of insecurity . . . and I never knew insecurity was the issue.  Now that I realize it, I want to share it with you, friends!  My journey through the book won’t be nearly as personal as your own journey through it, so I really do encourage you to find a way to read it.  

Tuesday, I shared with you the definition of someone who is insecure, and I shared the insecurity inventory.  Now I want to get into what Beth calls the "roots of insecurity.”  This is where it starts, friends, and it’s important we realize what’s causing our insecurity so we can yank it right out!  While you’re reading through these roots, try to identify which one is most prominent in your life.  Boy, was I sure glad to start digging some of these up!  At the end of each root, I've also inserted some scripture Beth lists that helps us deal with these ugly things.
  • Instability in the home -- Beth says if you've experienced any kind of instability in your home growing up, then that is a breeding ground for insecurity! (p.64)  Since our family has disappointed us, we end up spending our whole lives looking to people who will never disappoint us.  (Which I'm sure we all know will end in a disappointing results.)


"Even when you are old,  I will be the same.  Even when your hair has turned gray, I will take care of you.  I made you and will take care of you.  I will carry you and save you."  Isaiah 46:4, NCV (p.68)

  •  A significant loss -- this is basically what it sounds like.  Anytime in life we've lost someone close to us it can rock our boat and leave us feeling insecure.
  • Rejection -- "No matter the source, the shout (of rejection) translates into the language of the soul as one jolting message: I do not want you! . . . And through that betraying handshake, we find ourselves nodding, You are so right . . . I'm not worth wanting, I'm not worth loving, I'm not even worth living . . . " (p.73)  This kind of root leaves us feeling worthless.  


"I have chosen you and have not rejected you.  So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God." --Isaiah 41:9-10 (p.77)



  • Dramatic Change --  (This is the ugly root I'm slowly hacking away at.)  "Most women find a tremendous amount of security in sameness . . .our security is easily threatened by anything unknown yet suddenly unavoidable." (p.79)  In the past three years I've: moved all the way across the country from everything and everyone I know, graduated college, gotten married, left home, started teaching children at church and started a full-time job.  Now if that ain't some change, I don't know what is!  The worst part is, I'm the type of person that gets really nervous by the thought of change.  Boy, does God get a kick out of shuffling me around!


"Don't be misled, my dear brothers and sisters.  Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens.  He never changes (hallelujah!) or casts a shifting shadow.  He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word.  And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession."  -- James 1:16-18, NLT (p.80)



  • Personal Limitations -- "A learning disability can sow a harvest of insecurity.  So can a physical handicap, abnormality, or anything that makes us feel particularly different or inferior." (p.81)  
  • Personal Disposition -- (I'm afraid this is my 2nd ugly root.)  "Although insecurity and sensitivity are not synonymous, people who are especially tenderhearted are significantly more predisposed to insecurity.  In other words, the more tenderhearted we are, the more vulnerable to insecurity we'll  likely be." (p. 83)  I'm afraid this is so true.  Sometimes I think, that person really should work on being more kind/compassionate/discerning or less vocal/critical/honest, when really it's me that needs to be less sensitive!   
The other two roots of insecurity Beth talks about are Our Culture and Our Pride -- these two are roots that every single one of us has to deal with.  Our culture and our pride leave us feeling insecure all too often, but couple that with one (or if you're like me, two . . .or three) of the roots above, and it's no wonder we're lashing out in "idiot moments" so often!  I don't know about you, but I'm about fet up with the enemy having control in this area of my life.  I'm about ready to kick insecurity in the big fat fanny and say (in the words of my hubby), GOOD RIDDANCE TO BAD RUBBISH!

If you don't mind sharing, which root do you feel resonated the most with you?


6 comments:

  1. For me... dramatic change, rejection and personal disposition are all wrapped into one.

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  2. This is good insight - thanks for taking the time to share it and to include those verses at the end of each one - that was helpful.

    I remember some rejection as a child and the fear of it keeps me in knots sometimes. I think, "If only, I were ___________ (fill in the blank - different for different times or situations) they would like me better." That causes the most "idiot" moments for me as I say or do things that are born out of desperate "do you like me" feelings.

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  3. Rachel, First of all I can't believe I have not been a follower. I corrected that!
    Now, your post was so poignant and true. How wonderful at such a tender age you are learning God's way and His truth. Uprooting all the old lies, false idols and misplaced trust. Even though I am much older than you (could be your Mother) I still struggle with some types of insecurity. Not maybe the one's of my youth, but one's just as destructive. I'm going to prayerfully consider what insecurities Ihave because I am not believing God about and ask Him to help me change.

    Don't you love it when we can live so freely doing life God's way? No wonder He is so worthy of our PRAISE!!!!!

    Your blog and you and Nathan are just adorable. It was a breath of Spring air to visit you today.
    Blessing in abundance,
    Yvonne

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  4. Dramatic Change is definitely mine. I dislike any change and I believe Miss Abby has followed in her mom's footsteps. I need to work on this.

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  5. I am feeling rather insecured and finding something to cheer me up when I read this and reminded me that Bible is very important as guidance.
    Thank you and God bless!

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  6. @Anon--so glad you stumbled across our blog! We love visitors. Praying God will overwhelm you with his love today!

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All the best,

Rachel